Everyone gather around. Throw an arm around the person next to you or hold a hand.
Trust me, there is a way to get through this. This is the monster we all know as Alabama football.
MORE: Ranking Saban's Tide teams | What's next for Alabama?
Start with acceptance. Alabama is not going away. Nick Saban is not taking another job (not another word). Alabama is going to continue winning games. Lots of games.
If you're not an Alabama fan, you hate this: Four national championships in seven seasons and six consecutive "recruiting championships."
It's time to embrace the Crimson Tide. There's not a thing you, me or anyone else can do about their dominance. You don't have to root for Alabama and you probably won't.
But you should appreciate what Saban is doing in Tuscaloosa.
Really, you should.
Yes, Alabama gets the best players and should be winning titles. But consider this: In the nine seasons prior to Saban's arrival, Alabama had three head coaches, went 63-48, won two bowl games and one SEC title.
In Saban's nine seasons, Alabama is 105-18 with seven bowl wins, five SEC titles and the four national championships.
You know what that's called?
Stupid good.
After scratching together his first signing class at Alabama in 2007 — a class that featured just four four-star signees (the horror) — Saban has been on a devastating recruiting run through the state of Alabama, the South and wherever he wants to go. Better yet, Alabama doesn't have to go anywhere to find recruits. They flock to Alabama.
RECRUITING: Top 25 player tracker | Looking ahead to 2017
Alabama's 2016 class of 24 includes players from 11 states (from California to New York to Florida) and Washington, D.C. The Tide's 2017 class already has nine commitments, including the nation's No. 2 overall player (five-star) RB Najee Harris, seven four-star players and one three-star defensive end who everyone knows will get that fourth star between now and next signing day.
And why not Alabama? The school's recruiting slogan could read: If you're not interested in competiting for titles every year and being put in position to further your career in the NFL, then maybe Alabama isn't the right place for you.
Don't expect Saban's Process to turn National Signing Day into a giant spectacle. He doesn't need to. He's built the Bama brand into something it's never been and everyone is chasing it.
So don't roll your eyes at what Jim Harbaugh did Wednesday in Ann Arbor. Don't scoff when you see videos of coaches high-fiving in war rooms over an 18-year-old's commitment.
They all know what they're up against and it's not going away anytime soon.
And they need all the help they can get.
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